How come whenever I'm dealing with anything Canada related, they make me go through 100 hoops while sliding on a giant rusty blade?

— Ty Martell (@denofmusic) December 2, 2016

All Canadian hockey teams won yesterday. And my @Senators won tonight. Just give me this happiness for once, ok? Just this once.

— Ty Martell (@denofmusic) November 28, 2016

If I knew I could've voted illegally, I would've.

— Ty Martell (@denofmusic) November 28, 2016

Still remember when we met you, Shep. We know you like ships.

“How you get there is the worthier part.” #RIPBook http://bit.ly/2gxU27f http://pic.twitter.com/8c49Ii3BVl

— Ty Martell (@denofmusic) November 26, 2016

What did I say, America? What did I …..? I’m not even surprised anymore. http://bit.ly/2ghaEjc http://bit.ly/2fCKqJA

— Ty Martell (@denofmusic) November 26, 2016

Sorry. This is more accurate of me bringing it in. @pixedancer @Strawberrywish @abzdafab @mangrastubbs @megobits http://pic.twitter.com/KXlTk4kyjC

— Ty Martell (@denofmusic) November 26, 2016

Watch out. I’m bringing it in! @Strawberrywish @pixedancer @abzdafab @mangrastubbs @megobits http://pic.twitter.com/XftHZxlOhS

— Ty Martell (@denofmusic) November 26, 2016

Why in the Hell am I looking for Black Friday deals online like I’m some kind of person who has money to spend?

— Ty Martell (@denofmusic) November 26, 2016

Okay America! If I hear somebody gets trampled and dies (again) because of Black Friday deals, THAT IS IT! I AM DONE!

— Ty Martell (@denofmusic) November 25, 2016

Happy Thanksgiving #Lunicorns. I am thankful for each of you. @Strawberrywish @megobits @keller_007 @mangrastubbs @pixedancer @abzdafab

— Ty Martell (@denofmusic) November 24, 2016