28 years old today.

Now that I am “older” (but refuse to grow up) here’s what I’ve discovered:

1.) I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.
2.) My wild oats have turned into prunes and All Bran.
3.) I finally got my head together, now my body is falling apart.
4.) Funny, I don’t remember being absent minded.
5.) Funny, I don’t remember being absent minded.
6.) What were we talking about?
7.) It’s easier to get older than it is to get wiser.
8.) Some days you’re the dog; some days you’re the hydrant.
9.) I wish the buck stopped here; I sure could use a few.
10.) Kids in the back seat cause accidents.
11.) Accidents in the back seat cause kids.
12.) It’s hard to make a comeback when you haven’t been anywhere.
13.) The only time the world beats a path to your door is when you’re in the bathroom.
14.) If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them on my knees.
15.) When I’m finally holding all the cards, why does everyone else decide to play chess?
16.) Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you weren’t sleeping.
17.) It’s not hard to meet expenses … they’re EVERYWHERE!
18.) The only difference between a rut and a grave is in the depth.
19.) These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter…
I go somewhere to get something and then wonder what I’m here after.
20.) If all is not lost, THEN WHERE IS IT?
21.) Did I tell you this already?

Anyways….
Thanks for all the greetings! From my family and my friends.
thanks to Will D. for this email
Check out the updated Medieval Tavern by Lord Francis.

Oh and a HAPPY VD to everyone!

Happy SuperBowl to my peeps in the U.S. of A.

Everybody is going crazy there I bet.
It’s 1 of the three most important events in the States.

1.) Superbowl
2.) 4th of July
3.) Thanksgiving

You know sometimes, I do wish I live in the states.
Not only that there is where the money is,
They always have a reason to party!!!!

Except for the fact that I could get killed anytime by a 12 year old kid with his 45 Caliber.

Anyways….
Hopefully, with all the Superbowl parties,
I wish everyone arrived home safely
and be ready for the post Superbowl party tomorrow night.

We saw two movies this weekend.

Harry Pothead, oops Potter,
(my friend Nerisse would kill me.) which is an excellent movie.
And the other one we saw was something about a boy and his ring.
Everybody is after this ring with funky writings on it.
And the boy keeps getting stabbed or something.

Anyway…
it was one of the most amazing movies I have ever seen.
I totally can’t wait for the continuation.

Another thing I would like to say though.
Just to keep the records straight.
I did not get my dog’s name from that Pottyhead movie..(sorry again Nerisse).
I did not know that Harry Potter’s broom’s name was Nimbus 2000.
My dog’s name is Nimbus, and I thought of it because he looked like a thick cloud.
It was a toss between Cumulus or Nimbus.

Though now..
he responds to his new name….

NIMBUS NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
(followed by a Filipino swear word.) ..which Tracy can fluently pronounce.

During our lunch break at work yesterday,
two good friends, Natalie and Jason, pointed out this story in the papers
of a guy who was in a foreign country, dived into a shallow pool,
broke his neck and spine, couldn’t come home because they can’t give him a bed in a hospital.

Also, Tracy told me a patient that she used to take care of.
Dived into a lake or something, too shallow, hit his head
broke his spine, paralyzed from the waist down.

Can you just imagine?

I couldn’t help it.
I had to share my story.

I too dived into a shallow pool back home in the Philippines.
In school back in ’91
Hit my head, at the bottom floor, straight down.
All I felt was I bounced, chipped my two front teeth,
bit my tongue and head painfully hurting.

I was conscious though. I knew what was happening around me.
I did not faint nor collapsed. I just got out of the pool, with a bit of blood in my mouth.
Went straight to the showers, checking my head if it cracked or something.
Nope.
My mother was right.
This proved what she said..
I have a very hard head.

I am still doin’ fine though.
After 11 years, all I have are these unbearable headaches that I have been accustomed to having.

All I wanted to say was,
I am so very grateful.
To God and his glory, that I am still alive to this day.

Still able to play guitar, play music, appreciate the harmony.
Still able to laugh, cry and feel.
Bitch about work and the traffic.
Complain about everything.
Spending time with my nieces.
My brother and I admiring cars. Checkin’ out the ladies.
Sleep in a bed.
Watch sports on TV.
Drive my car.
Walk everywhere.
(Screw that!) Drive everywhere.
Meet new people.
Play in the snow.
Buy more RAM.
Learn Linux.
Learn Windows XP.
Buy more RAM.
Surf Porn
Drink wine.
Eat my favorite foods.
Especially Tracy’s cooking.
Enjoy her company.
Laugh at her jokes.
Love her with all my heart.
And the opportunity to have kids of my own.

I say these because,
I always told myself I hate my life, and always tried to fix it.
I always said I never wanted to be born if I knew this was going to be a cruel world.
But now I realized, there has to be some purpose. Or a reason why I am still here….

and that reason, I think,
is to annoy everybody else. 😉

You know how sometimes you have issues with your families?
Oh yeah! You know what I mean.

You always end up fixing everybody’s troubles with everybody,
you can never live your life the way you want,
and you always have to live it how they want you to live.

Christmas, Birthdays, Holidays.
Always the same thing.
Something or someone will always piss you off. There is always one in the crowd.

But you know what is even worse?
People who tries to mind your families’ business.
Not only that, they mind your own freakin’ business too!!

They always tell you…
“Oh I just care and I treat you guys as family.”

Hahahahhahaha!!!
You are fuckin’ funny!!

I mean, even me and my brother don’t even get on each other’s business
And here you are, shovin’ your gossip-filled face on us?

I get pissed DAMMNNITT!!!!

You know, the more people I know,
the more I like my dog.

Come here Nimbus!!
Stop humping my leg!

It’s my Mother’s Birthday today.

Oh man! I have no gift.

I am in trrooouubbllleeeee!!!

How about I tell her,
I’ll be a good son this time?
Nnaahhh, tried that already…didn’t work.

Oh well.
I guess I won’t be the favorite son this time…(again).

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOTHER!!

I better call my Dad. Hehehhee.

My best wishes to everyone this new year.
I hope you all had a nice New Year’s eve.

Me?
Holy glutton in a shirt!

I ate so much meat, I think I am going to change my name to “Mad Cow.”
Which made me think about everybody’s number one New Year’s resolution….

Lose Weight – Eat less!
Okay. I must admit. It did cross my mind.
Though, “Live and Enjoy life” still tops my list.

…. and try not to be pessimistic (It does not work!).

-Less hate…more understanding.
-Try to live actively.
-Try to play guitar like no one is watching.
-To sing like no one is listening.
-And be more grateful for what I have ..(and for what I will get..)

Also..
I would like to thank my friends who have invited me to spend time with them New Year’s eve.
Though I could only be wasted and be embarrassed in one place,
I still thank you for the invitation.
That means I have started the Year blessed with friends who care.

Manigong Bagong Taon sa inyong lahat!

I just got this email and I thought I would share this with everyone.
Please read it with an open mind.

“Twas the Night Before Ramadan” by Mullah Mohammed Omar

‘Twas the night before Ramadan, and all through the cave,
Not a creature was stirring; it felt like a grave.
The turbans were hung by the firepit with care,
In hopes that the Air Force would not soon be there.

The soldiers were restless without any beds,
While visions of air strikes flashed in their heads.
Osama in his burkha and I in my goatskin cap,
Had just settled down for a cold, barren winter’s nap.

When out on the ledge there arose such a clatter,
I grabbed my Kalashnikov to see what was the matter.
Away from the racket I ran like a girl,
Tripped over a goat; into a ball I did curl.

The moon shone down on the new-fallen snow,
And lit up the valley with an ominous glow,
When, what to my one good eye should appear,
But a dozen Apaches, and tanks in the rear.

And their leader, so fearless, his troops he did push,
I knew in an instant it must be George Bush.
More rapid than eagles his forces they came,
And they whistled, and shouted, and called out our names;

“Now Omar! Osama! Muhammad! Abdul!
We come for you now; we’ve taken Kabul!
To the top of the cliffs! To the back of their caves!
When you chose this war, you dug your own graves!”

As the dry leaves that before the assault choppers fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, light up the sky.
So up to the ledge his forces they flew,
With full magazines, and flamethrowers too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard with a thud,
The explosions of Tomahawks; not one was a dud.
As I chambered my rifle, and was turning around,
Osama was there, disguised in a gown.

He was dressed all in drag, from his head to his toes,
And he said he would flee while I held off his foes;
A bundle of money he had stuffed in his pack,
He said “I’m going to Baghdad and I’m not looking back!”

His eyes were all glassy; he trembled with fear;
The American bombs, they rang in his ears.
He saddled his goat, then turned tail and fled,
But a Marine Corps sniper got him in the head.

I watched with cold fear as his body did slump;
The goat threw him off; he fell with a thump.
And so, there I stood, my plans all destroyed,
About to suffer a fate I could not avoid;

I dropped to my knees; asked Allah for help,
His voice boomed in my ears, “You ignorant whelp!
I gave you the Bible, the Torah and Koran,
But you were too arrogant to even understand.

I told you to honor your neighbors and respect your wives;
Not to enslave them, or degrade their lives!
You invoke My name to sanction your deeds,
But you are the last thing that this world ever needs.

And so, I’ll send you and Bin Laden to Hell.
The last words I heard, as the bombs surely fell,
Were from George Bush himself as he mounted the wall,
“One nation, under God, with liberty and justice for all!”

Merry Christmas Everybody!!
Hope your holidays are filled with (beer) cheer!

..and remember…
it is not about the guy in the red suit….nor the gifts.
Maligayang Pasko sa inyong lahat!

Three more days before our Christmas Holidays!!
Oh My God! this is going to be the longest three days ever.

I woke up at 7:30 am today,
Alarm clock blasting like the bombs at Kandahar.
I open my eyes around 7:45, thinking “Is it Friday yet?”
Just totally unable to move, wondering what would happen if I would call in sick.
Nnaahhh!! too obvious.
I couldn’t think of any excuse.

Lord help me.
This will be a very long day.

Anyways,
I read this article in the news today, (okay I didn’t read it..but I read the title)
that some people complain about the celebration of Christmas.
This reporter said that
“Not everybody celebrates this holiday… and some find it offensive.
So it shouldn’t be celebrated as grand.”
or something like that.

Well, Here’s what I say to that.

FFFFAAAAAAAKKKKKKKKKKYYYYOOOOUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!

I mean, I don’t celebrate Hannukkah,
but you don’t see me complaining that I don’t get gifts do you?
You don’t see me joining you on your Gay Pride Parade,
but you don’t see me bitchin’ about how you cause traffic out on the road.

What is up your freakin butt?
Geezz..some people huh?

You know, no matter how much you care and understand about others,
some people are just plain assholes.

Oh please …let the weekend come.