Last Saturday,
we were at my Mother’s house for a visit.
My brother’s family were there as well.

Gabriel, my nephew, was born a week after Tyler.
So both of them pretty much steal the whole show.

I also noticed one thing about babies.

See, whenever Tyler and Gabriel are together,
if one cries, the other one does too.
If one sees the other, the other one smiles and acknowledges the fact
that they are the “Stars” of the moment.

Don’t you ever wonder how babies,
when they see each other, seem to be amazed of the other.

When you go to the mall or the park,
you always see them looking at each other.
They even shout out “Look, Baby!”

Ever wonder why?

I think I know.

The reason behind this is that,
I think they all know each other
from heaven.

And they were like,

“Heeey!! You made it here too!!”

It amazes me how fast Tyler grows.
He now can crawl and sit up on his own.
Just today he grabbed a hold of the couch while sitting on the floor,
Trying to pull himself to stand up.

It won’t be long now.
He will start walking soon,
And let the race begin.

I always play music in front of him.
He always shakes his hands from excitement,
Whenever he sees me pick up my guitar.
He seems to like it very much.

He stares at my hands and the guitar as I strike the strings.
The other day, I gave him my guitar pick,
and since babies put everything in their mouths,
I try to be on guard, making sure he won’t stick it in his,
To my surprise, he looked at me,
Reached out and tried to strum the strings with the pick.

Babies are smart.

HE Really does have a way of things.
And HE too does have a way of reminding us of what we are,
and ways to teach us to understand it.

What happened yesterday really made me think.
Sometimes I do have hatred in my heart, and
Sometimes I must admit, it would be easier to take things into your own hands.

I get so mad sometimes, that I wish harm to everyone who makes me feel so.
Even death. A painful one.
So painful that the marrows of their soul would anguish in misery.

I am only human, and sometimes I can not control how
these thoughts linger in my heart and mind.

I do pray for guidance, strength and understanding,
And I know that my LORD up on high does hear me.
But I do not hear him back.

So I believe this is what HE did.

As I turn on the TV this morning,
The “Lord Of The Rings, Fellowship Of The Ring” was on The Movie Network.
And everyone who knows me, knows that I am addicted to the LOTR.
It was the scene where The Fellowship is down at Moria and
Gandalf is trying to figure the way out.
Frodo saw Gollum, and told Gandalf that Gollum deserved death.
Then Gandalf said..

‘Deserves it! I daresay he does.
Many that live deserve death. And some that die deserve life.
Can you give it to them?
Then do not be too eager to deal out death in judgement.
For even the very wise cannot see all ends.

What a way to get my attention.
As I hear this, I looked at my son,
Smiling, and seems to be acknowledging the movie.

But if something did happen to him,
I surely do not know how I would remember all this.

You know every Friday,
My Mom baby-sits Tyler and he spends the night at her house.
So while we were on our way,
Of course, since I have Tyler in the car,
I am extra careful and alert while driving.

So we were at a stoplight,
And of course as a driver,
you are very observant of your surroundings.

First, I check on Tyler to see how he’s doing.

I saw a green Pontiac Sunfire behind me,
With an elderly lady of Indian descent with her daughter,
I say this because I see the red mole sign on their forehead.
They are laughing, talking, probably gossiping.

I check on Tyler to see how he’s doing.

I noticed the Wendy’s restaurant on the right side of the busy intersection.
The Price Club store on the left, Right beside Tim Horton’s,
And a sign that says, “Entrance” to the Furniture Warehouse.

I check on Tyler to see how he’s doing.

I also noticed that it is almost our turn to go and the light will turn green soon.
Then I suddenly noticed the Green Pontiac Sunfire coming straight behind me.

BAM!!!!

What the FFAAHH???
We were at a stoplight!! How can she step on the gas?

I stormed out of the Car,
Checked on my son if he’s okay,
He did not cry, and he was fine.

I rushed to the lady’s window, and let out a burst of
4 letter words you would not hear at your Sunday Church.

I am usually sympathetic for some drivers,
But not when my son is on board.
I remember screaming that I have a baby in my car,
And something about “You Stupid idiot.”

She said, (with a strong accent)
“Oh I am very sorry, it was an accident”

Well no shit !!!

Then she was like,
“I am so sorry”¦
Oh, is that your baby?. Oh he is beautiful.”

What the hell was that for?
She freakin’ rammed my car and tells me that my baby is cute.
To lessen my anger?
So I would not call the cops?

Luckily there was no damage,
but I can see a faint mark of her car plates on my bumper.

I still checked on Tyler,
as all the other cars pass us.

I don’t remember being this mad,
Only when I deal with the Canadian Government.

And from all of these,
After much contemplating,
This is what I have learned,

The reason why some people are still alive is because it is illegal to kill them.
Oh and there is no cure for stupidity.

You know sometimes I wonder,
if I am doing a good job as a stay at home dad.

I must admit, this is the hardest job I have ever done in my life.
I got to hand it to all the mothers of this world.
How do you guys manage to do it all?
Unbelievable.

I know I am over the “EGO thing”,
about staying at home and not being able to provide for my family.
I say this because I dare any male out there to try and be a mother for a day.

It’s funny how we have this double standard thing,
that when women go out and work, and do basically any man can do,
they are being cheered.
But when Men stay at home and do what women do at home,
It’s the exact opposite.

It truly is a full time job,
and it’s a job that you can’t quit.

I thought it was just changing diapers,
and bottle feeding when I signed up.
But Nooooooo..
There is so much more.

And it’s quite amazing when the day is over,
And when I say Over, that is “hoping Tyler would not wake up
at 3 in the morning kinda Over”.
When all is done quiet and peaceful,
When you finally have time for yourself,
You have no energy left.
I’m serious.

I update this site at the end of the day, (when I can)
because I have no one to talk to, Tracy works at night.
I might explode if I don’t.

Also, now that Tyler can crawl,
He is so mobile, he will not stay in one place.
So I have to be on extra alert mode.
His teeth are also coming out,
so he is just not having a good time.

I also read some parenting articles from “American Baby” Magazine,
and sometimes the more I read it,
the more I feel scared of not doing a good job.

Plus there are so many things that they want you to do
to your baby that I am afraid that I will not be able to do them all.
And if I didn’t, I fear something would go wrong with my child.

They even have suggestions on how to decipher your child’s cries.
So, there I was, using my ear for tone and music,
listening to Tyler’s diverse sounds.
And I still end up going with my gut instinct.
(Thankfully, I am usually right.)
It’s just frustrating sometimes when
you can’t figure out whats wrong with them.

A good friend of mine, Tammy V., once told me,
“Remember always that Tyler can not speak yet,
and his only way to tell you something is to cry”

That helped me a lot. (thanks Tam)

Thank you also to My Mom, and Tracy’s Mom,
for all the help and advice we get.
It’s just great knowing that I can call any of you anytime.

Thanks to my son, Tyler Austin,
for teaching me about myself.
you are all worth it son.
I love you very much.

And thanks to Tracy,
for telling me that I am doing a good job,
and for driving an hour and a half,
to and from work, just for the betterment of our future.

Thanks to the Lord up on high,
for the strength and patience,

And I also would like to thank the Academy for this little drama speech.
Thank you!!!

*Raises trophy* as crowd cheers.
*Fade to black — on to commercial*