October 10,

Make Lemonade

I am sure you have heard that quote,
“When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.”

It is such a lovely cliche invented by optimists.
I have no problem with that.
People make use of what can help them cope up.
Cope up with life.

Life is both funny and cruel.

Life gives us “lemons.”
A metaphor for “whatever we are dealt.”
Something we have no control over.
It’s the given part of life.
You can not make lemons.

Everything else, is up to you.
The “Lemonade” part is what you can do.

But here lies the dilemma.

I can make lemonade.
I have no problem with that.
I can do that on my own.

The problem is,
Life did not give me any “sugar.”

I cannot make sugar.
This lemonade turned out very, very sour.
Who drinks Sour Lemonade?

Thanks a lot, Life!
Thanks a lot.

Canada Thanksgiving 2011

This year, I am thankful for a lot of things.

But I am mainly thankful for the fact
that I haven’t lost my mind yet.

“Yet!”

Happy Thanksgiving, Canada.
Crank up the Tragically Hip tunes.
Bring out the two-fours.
Sit your bums on the chesterfield,
and watch Hockey Night!

Eh?

Thanks but no Thanks-giving

Yesterday was Thanksgiving in Canada.

So, I thought it would be my little way of saying thanks,
by going to church during my lunch break at work.

Well, not just to say thanks but also to vent out some anger issues.

Anyway,
So I went to this church,
just a couple of miles from work.

I parked my car,
went to the front door,

“Locked.”

So I went around,
Looking for another entrance.
I saw one door,
unlocked,
I went in.

After about 3 minutes of adjusting into my solemn, quiet mode,
there was this elderly lady, that passed right in front of me.
I am not sure if she saw me, but she went out the door,
and locked me inside.

I ran towards the door, knocking loudly,
as I hear her say,
“Hold on just a minute.”

She opened the door, looking pretty upset,
She asked, “How’d you get in?”

I said, “Through this door Ma’am.”

“The church is closed, and I am going to have to lock the doors.” She answered.

I replied, “I was just hoping to find a church to pray.”

“Well, this church is closed, just come back next time.”
She said hurriedly and closed the door behind her.

I walk towards my car, shaking my head in disbelief.

How crazy was that?
I got kicked out of my place of worship.

It was quite disheartening, because I was really in dire need of
deep contemplation and some spiritual attitude adjustment.

Church has always been a place for me to think things through.

Not today.
Not this time.

Remember when churches used to be open all day?
I do!
I know they used to.

It really is getting harder and harder to talk to the Big Boss upstairs.
In these troubled times,
along with some personal turmoil you have,
you can’t help but question your relationship with your God.

Sure, I know He loves me.
I just think I am not one of His favorites.

Am I still thankful?
Of course I am.

I am here writing this crap,
You are there reading this crap,
We’re alive aren’t we?
Let’s just hope we’ll make it through another day.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving Canada!

Today I should be thankful,
that with the current situation here in the States,
with all the calamities,
with all the crime and violence,
and with the rumour of a bird flu epidemic,

I should be thankful that,
if ever hell breaks loose, and worse comes to worst,
I can bring back my family to the Great White North.

Unless they stop us at the border,
because they suspect us of having the bird flu virus.

Then there would be thousands of Americans trying to enter Canada,
all infected by the virus.
Then cannibalism would start.
As everyone would turn into zombies after 28 days.
Then that would leave me no choice
but to shoot every freakin’ zombie that tries to bite me.

I am going to have to ride my horse,
like a horseman of the apocalypse,
and I will unleash hell!

And when I unleash hell,
that means I am very pissed.
And nothing would make me happy.
Nothing!

Except maybe Ice Cream.
I like Ice Cream.

Must…..

AAAAAAARRRRGGGHH!!!!!

This Linux machine is Killing me!!!!!!!!!!

Head is hurting….
must…
reinstall….
again….