“He’s out of Danger,
You can stop worrying now.”

These were the words I had hoped for these past few days.
And today, I finally heard them.

A couple of days ago,
My cousin and his wife were accidentally hit by a stray bullet
back home in the Philippines, while waiting for the bus.

I can not explain the feeling of worry and helplessness,
while dreading the next phone call I might receive would be what I fear.

I can not explain the panic I had,
As I try to figure out his condition
while talking to the nurses in the ICU.

I can not explain how I endlessly search for a news report online,
Hoping to find clues on how, what, when and where it happened,
And who’s responsible,
but in a way,
A part of me would rather not see or read anything about it,
Since it will re surface my anger, worries and fears.

I can not explain how distressing it is that,
This happened because someone had easy access to guns and ammunitions.

I can not explain why bad things happen to good people.

I can not explain how I feel that,
Even though how many times I pray, I feel I am not being heard.

And since hearing that my cousin and his wife are doing better now.

I can not explain how grateful I am to the Doctors and Nurses.

I can not explain how much I would like to thank their friends
who willingly volunteered to donate blood
And being by their side.

I can not explain how lucky we are, to have those good Samaritans
Who brought them to the hospital.

I can not explain,
How wrong it is for me to doubt the power of prayer.

And since hearing those words, that I need not worry anymore,

I can not explain why I still do.