Sometime in September of last year,
We visited Tracy’s folks down in Kansas.

We drove around,
seeing new sights,
enjoying the sceneries.

Road trips tend to take it’s toll.
And somewhere, somehow,
When you gotta go,
You really have to go.

So I asked Tracy’s Mom if there would be any washrooms nearby.
(“Restrooms” as they are called here in the States.)

So her sweet Mother, pulled over to this convenience store in the middle of nowhere,
And told me to go in there and use theirs.

So I did.

I asked the Lady who was standing on the other side of the counter,
if I could use the restroom. Politely.

She grinned, sighed, and rudely told me:
“Ugh!, It’s only for customer use.”

I said, “You mean, I have to buy something before I could use it?”

“Well, Of course!” She answered swiftly.

So, I tried to be smart and quickly thought of the cheapest thing I could buy.
“I’ll take a pack of gum then please.” I said proudly.

“That’ll be $1.99”, as she pressed the cash register.

“Two dollars?” I shrieked.
I thought I peed right then and there.

“Uh huh!” She said with a hint of victory on her tone.

“Fine then.” I whispered.

Accepting my defeat,
I handed her my two dollars,
put the gum in my pocket and hurriedly used the restroom.

I go back to the car, and told everyone that it cost me 2 dollars
to pee in that little store.

Then it hit me,
I realized what I had done.

I politely did what I was told,
and used the facilities like a normal, decent human being.

What I should have done,

Was to pee all over the floors,
Smear soap all over the walls,
Leave the faucet running,
Spit on the mirrors
And throw the toilet paper roll in the toilet bowl.

That would have been cool!
That would have been 2 dollars worth.

But I didn’t.
Why?
Because I am a nice guy.