Today actually marks my 15th year,
living in North America.

I have lived both in Ontario, Canada and
Florida, USA where I currently reside.

As I look back,
I remembered that I shared what I have learned
while living in Canada.

Now let me tell you what I have learned so far
about the Sunshine State.

These won’t be as long,
because I do not go out much and I don’t have any friends.

First, I finally found out why it is called the Sunshine State.
(Even though it has been proven that Arizona gets more sunlight.)
The reason why, is because when the sun is out,
it will always be in your eye.

No matter where you go.
When you’re walking, the sun will impair your vision.
It’ll always be in your line of sight when you drive too.
Sunglasses don’t help much.
Even those large sunglasses that cover three quarters of your face.
It does not help.

Second,
When you drive, it is mandatory to talk on your cell phone.
Everybody does it.
Even 90 year old Grandmas.

Third,
Nobody uses their turn signals.
No one.
If you see someone with their turn lights on,
it’s probably been on since 1989.
So you should tell them it has been accidentally activated.

Fourth,
Rush hour actually starts two days before you leave.

Fifth,
When you order food from a drive thru, there will be a 98% chance that they will mess up your order.
The remaining 2% actually is reserved for the food they forgot to include.

And lastly,
Disney is in reality, both the happiest and saddest place on earth.
You can actually hear your wallet mourning the loss of your savings.

—
I chose to stop there because,
One important thing I have learned here in FL.
is that you do not want to piss Floridians off.

Just for the mere fact that
they still cannot decide if they should
threaten you first with their guns before they shoot you,
or shoot you first before they show you what they’re packin’

I’ll play it safe.
For now.

Until I get me one from Walmart.